Sometimes, deep in my heart, i wish i can read people's mind to know if they are really being sincere or just forcing through. Too many times, i wish im not too nice but the feeling is just unbearable.. Feeling sorry for something that's not even my fault. At times, i feel like just saying what they deserved to be heard but i dont have the strength to tell the truth to their face let alone screaming things out. Because i know, i know how its bad enough to be told off like that. Its a sad thing altogether to not even realised one's mistake beforehand. One way or another, its always comes down to me..

I havnt been talking much about work but work's been overwhelming despite the tinge of joy that came once in awhile.. sooner or later i probably will be given a much higher responsibility than im already holding now and that's scary.. My supervisor gonna left his duty for about 3 months for his Phd and the first time i heard that,I literally said out to him what's going to happen to me haha. okie its not even funny.Playing guessing game here and there and i concluded something. And that something is about to happen.Im just afraid i couldnt take up the challenge.

Still strong, i just need a lil push from everyone..
a lil push to keep me holding on and that's strength from Allah to come back to me.That's all.

That's all i need for now;

I tend to think alot, about what should have been said, about what should have been done.Often, you will find me staring into spaces but that's just me. I dont like to show my sadness and i tried not to break down in front of any beings that i know of simply cos i realized, it doesnt get better.When you see those tears in my eyes, that's when you know i really cant keep up with the facade any longer.Im not someone who opens up easily to people but when i do, its because i trust you. I dont know how to be a good friend but i promise i will be there like how a friend should be.

Sometimes, my actions, my sayings, my words, can be really unpredictable but that's when i really really meant what was said. I am surrounded with beautiful souls but at times, i prefer being alone.I am hard to read, like a plain old boring novel with a one word tittle on that front cover. This what makes most people gave up on knowing the real me. Im trying to be a better muslimah insyaAllah yet im still far from behind. This just me; ▶Nur Khalidah Jasmani◀;

Layout created by mymostloved with background from sheiskits and inspiration from sagacity.