While other people have the privilege to go back home every late as possible, i dont.
While other people have the freedom to go just anywhere they want with whoever they want, i dont.

But i never take that as a form of curfew. i never. So i dont have a night life. It doesnt matter.
Im still happy with how my life is.

Ayah said i must be back by 7. Full stop. So i rushed home painfully and gave him the sour face after that. But little did i know, he was just protecting me. I know his reasons. All that doings. I know now. So dont blame him. Dont. Because its my choice now.

While other people thought im a fortunate one with all the sincere praises after that, deep inside i ask forgiveness from Allah because often then not, i know im not.
While other people thought im a good one and thus raise a lil bit of expectations in me, little did they know that im just a human being and humans make mistakes and these mistakes hurt other human beings as well.

While other people thought that im strong, they think they can hurt me again and again.
You will meet all kinds of people, experience all kind of things but that's okie.Forgive the wrongs, but never forget the right ones.

This life. My life may be a long process. And maybe i havnt really found all the reasons why things are the way they are. But i hope that i will cherish every little things. Come and go as they are. so be it. My life. Im just trying to make the best out of it. I hope you do. And maybe, just maybe.. its these hurting and littlest things that will make everything in the end worthwhile. InsyaAllah. Amin.


ps: Dont think too much bout this song playing in my blog. Its nothing. i just like the beat and because i love nineteen minutes by jodi picoult, somehow i find this song so much related to it. :)

I tend to think alot, about what should have been said, about what should have been done.Often, you will find me staring into spaces but that's just me. I dont like to show my sadness and i tried not to break down in front of any beings that i know of simply cos i realized, it doesnt get better.When you see those tears in my eyes, that's when you know i really cant keep up with the facade any longer.Im not someone who opens up easily to people but when i do, its because i trust you. I dont know how to be a good friend but i promise i will be there like how a friend should be.

Sometimes, my actions, my sayings, my words, can be really unpredictable but that's when i really really meant what was said. I am surrounded with beautiful souls but at times, i prefer being alone.I am hard to read, like a plain old boring novel with a one word tittle on that front cover. This what makes most people gave up on knowing the real me. Im trying to be a better muslimah insyaAllah yet im still far from behind. This just me; ▶Nur Khalidah Jasmani◀;

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